When I sat down to write this edition of the series I really didn’t think I would have much to write about. To my surprise, even when at my lowest I found there were actually a lot of things to feel grateful for. This really filled me with positivity. Even though life gets us down every once in a while, being grateful for even the smallest of things can really help us to move forward.
I would like to say, thank you May for:
- I didn’t know whether or not to talk about my ectopic pregnancy on the blog because I didn’t know how it would be received. It is a difficult subject; one that isn’t easy to write about, or to read about. I went for it anyway and the support and words of encouragement I received from my fellow bloggers was amazing. In particular, I would like to give a shout out to Donna of Bobsy’s Mum and Kimberly of Media Mummy for all of their support over the last few weeks. I had thought about giving up blogging, and I did take a break for a few weeks, but just being a part of this fantastic community really encouraged me to continue. Thank you all so much for making a really difficult time in my life a little bit more bearable. I will be eternally grateful to each and every one of you.
- I have had to rely (a lot) on friends and family lately to look after Molly while I have been in and out of the hospital. They have all been incredible and I feel so lucky to be surrounded by such amazingly supportive people. Molly might as well have moved in with my sister she’s been there that much!
- How amazing is the NHS? It is definitely something us Brits should be grateful for. I have spent a lot of time at the early pregnancy unit at my local hospital over the last couple of months and the staff members have been absolutely incredible. Each and every member of staff we came across was fantastic; whether it be a doctor, consultant, nurse, sonographer, researcher, receptionist, phlebotomist, cleaner etc etc… I really cannot praise them enough for the quality of the service they provide, and for the support and understanding they show to each and every patient they deal with. And they are busy, I mean real busy in that unit, and they still show warmth and compassion to every patient. I really cannot thank them enough.
- Even though this ectopic pregnancy has devastated and broken mine and Chris’ hearts, it has brought us closer together as a couple. It was touch and go for a while as we both took our frustrations out on each other. We are coming through the other side now though and we are stronger than ever. We have talked. Cried, a lot. We have been angry at the world, and with each other. We have been resentful. But, most importantly, we have been there for each other. Though we never got to meet our little angel baby, we have decided to put a little box of reminders together and we have already arranged to attend a memorial service at the hospital later on in the year. We are each other’s rocks, for now and always. I know we will each cope with our loss because we have the support of one another.
- My cousin is a reiki practitioner and she gave me some healing as I was miscarrying my little angel. It really helped to heal my mind and soul. I am not sure I would be coping with my grief had it not been for this. Reiki really is amazing and I would definitely recommend trying it.
- We had some nice weather again this month, which is always something to be grateful for. We got the paddling pool out for the kids – they loved it, and we have even had a BBQ.
- As she is getting older, the bond between Molly and Chris is really growing. They share such a beautiful relationship. Molly absolutely idolises Chris and proclaims it to anyone who will listen. She says proudly, “this is my daddy”, whilst giving him a massive hug. In the evenings and weekends I rarely get a look in with her. She really is a daddy’s girl. Molly always wants to play little games with Chris, her favourite being tea parties or playing with her dolls. And Chris is more than happy to go along with all of her games. I just can’t wait for the days Molly wants to paint Chris’ nails and put bobbles in his hair (though she may struggle with that as I don’t think it will last much longer. Ha-ha. Sorry Chris, but I speak only the truth!)
- A few months back Molly suddenly developed a fear of the water, which came out of nowhere really. She now seems to be (slowly) overcoming it. She is becoming more confident in the water at the swimming pool (maybe now she has some yellow armbands like her cousin..?) which is very encouraging to see. My cousin (who used to be a swimming teacher) recommended getting Molly to blow bubbles in the water when swimming. We encouraged Molly to try it in the bath to start with. I think it has really done the trick. I will give her a few more weeks before deciding on whether or not to sign her up for swimming lessons but we are really taking a step in the right direction.
So that is my gratitude post for May. The month really was tough at times but there were still so many things to be grateful for.
Thank you for reading,